Sunday, July 22, 2012

I'm no supermom

The objects of my love and frustration.
This has been one of those weeks that has me questioning whether I'm cut out to be a stay-at-home-mom. This question pops up with regular frequency, because, let's face it, this is a hard gig! People often comment that I make it look easy, but I'm not quite sure that's the case. It doesn't feel easy to me. In fact, most days I'm fried. I declared to my husband at the end of the week that I'm a touch-free zone because I just survived a week with the crabbiest and clingiest kids and I'm all touched-out. Some days I long to kiss my kids good-bye as I drop them off at daycare and escape for eight hours. I envy my friends who get adult interaction that doesn't involve talking about kids, playing with kids or refereeing kids. I definitely mourn lunch dates with co-workers and office banter. Instead my days consist of dirty diapers, bartering with a toddler to pee on the potty, negotiating what constitutes as a suitable lunch for both mommy and a stubborn kid, play dates at the park, hours and hours of play time on the floor driving trucks, making train noises, coloring with crayons, and removing item after item from my baby's mouth. And these days my schedule revolves around nap and meal times. Some days all I have left at the end of the day is enough energy to plop onto the couch, hold the remote in my hand and watch a mindless show on TV. So if I have sent out the wrong impression that my job as a stay-at-home-mom is easy, I apologize! Because it is definitely far from easy.

Trying on Mommy's slippers.
With that said, the bad is balanced out with a lot of good. Although this might well be one of the hardest jobs ever, it is definitely all worth it in the end. I get to be there for my kids' every moment, witness their ever-changing interests, experience the mundane day-to-day activities, teach them, play with them and just be with them. I will never lie and pretend it's great 100% of the time, but I absolutely love it nonetheless. The hugs, the slobbery kisses, the smiles, the belly laughs, the I-Love-Yous, the declarations of "more" or "that was fun, Mommy!" are better than any paycheck. And when I sneak a peak at my children as they sleep peacefully in their beds at night, I know without a doubt that I'm right where I'm supposed to be--home with them.

So you might ask, what triggered the most recent episode of doubting my job as a stay-at-home mom? I can easily sum it up with the question: Isn't it supposed to be Terrible Twos, not Awful Threes? Spencer is not quite three yet, but boy does he have what I like to call a "crankitude." Cranky + attitude = crankitude. I'd love to chalk up his bad behavior to not feeling well, but it's been going on longer than his sickness. I must be honest and recognize what we mothers hate to admit: my almost three-year-old is a bit of a monster!! He throws tantrums; he whines; he squeals at the top of his lungs; he stubbornly refuses to listen; he deliberately misbehaves; he tests every boundary ever set and then some. And that is all in the span of a morning. Try dealing with that every single day without becoming a frazzled mess.

I try to remain calm and handle his behavior reasonably, but I lose my temper a lot more than I'm proud to admit. I feel like my control is slipping and have done all I can to handle this stage, so if anyone has suggestions or just some kind words of encouragement, please send them my way!

Urgent Care waiting room.
Spencer's mood has been especially crabby this week for a legitimate reason. He has swimmer's ear, which is an infection of the outer ear. It is contracted from the bacteria in pools and lakes and rivers. I'm thinking he must have gotten it camping last weekend. The doctor at Urgent Care couldn't get a good look at his inner ear due to the wax buildup, but she was guessing by the amount of pain he was in that he also has a inner ear infection. After a few rough, sleepless nights, I am happy to report that the medicine has seemed to work its magic. Too bad there isn't a magical medicine to cure three year old behavior, huh?

Finally going home after a long wait at Target for medicine.
On top of Spencer's ear infection, Ashton has been especially clingy and crabby, too. I'm guessing it's due to teething still. Please, teeth, just pop out already!!!

Between dealing with both of my crabby kids, we were still able to do a few projects. We decorated luminary bags for our Relay for Life weekend (more on that later) and did a quick letter X activity. We Xeroxed Spencer's hands. I then made it into the upper and lower case flashcard. Two letters left. Hip hip hooray!

More random pictures from the week:
Waiting to play in the rain that never came.
Daddy made a fort/castle/tunnel/railroad on my heavenly Angie Wednesday Night that I cherish weekly.
Ash is a good sharer.

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